I remember those curses whenever we had to do our internship report. Recently, someone I met during my internship added me on facebook. Being an intern with some other responsibility that day, I was unsure whether to go forward to say hi, but I guess that person caught my eager eyes. Having worked with this person on previous projects, I like what she stood her. She is quite an inspiration.

Out of curiosity, I went to her profile page and got a link to a website with details about her projects. Mind-blowing. I like the cause and the motivation behind her works. I was very impressed.

...

Honestly, I wonder if things would be different if I were not brought up in a rather traditional chinese family. Would I dare to dream? When my sister and I shared a room, we used to annoy each other with incessant chatter when we have trouble sleeping. She asked me why I do not involve myself heavily in the performing arts. That time, my answer was clear. I want to and I will. She probed further, what about money. And I replied, it may not be a lot, but I am young, I am going to explore! My sister agreed with me.

I remember that conversation in the dark because it is a dream of mine that I have shelved. My friend told me his internship at one of my dream company. My heart burst with joy for him, but a part of my heart also sank six feet under. I felt like I had betrayed myself. A part of me died. I wanted to collapse and do a Lear rage.

I wanted to immediately email that director for a position with her too. Yet, I have grown to think of the responsibilities on my shoulders as well. It sucks. Maybe this is the cue to sing the Tos’R’Us song.

Sigh. What am I to do??

Are you a dreamer?