I am typing this using my newly downloaded ommwriter that Jon introduced me to.
It is a software that blocks out all distractions. A winter landscape fills the background with 2 lonesome trees covered with snow. I alsmost feel like I am sitting on a blanket of snow breathing the cold air with my macbook giving me some warmth as I type.

Recently i have been feeling a little stressed. There are so manh things to settle for MIMBY!! Some nights I find myself writing down the list of things I have to do... but I never knew where to start. So I do other things like chat to people online, read more Calvin and Hobbes comics even though I may have probably read most of them, and still laugh at the same fascinating childlike wonder response, It's strange isn't it? December feels extremely busy, like an old grandfather clock that continues to tick for generations. Never stopping, always going, and still having that sense of beauty and charm.

Christmas. We can sing joyful joyful, and dream of silver bells, and ask the passer bys if they can hear the angels sing... but in the midst of all the hustle and bustle, I asked myself how come I am secretly wishing tis Christmas was pass by faster (to some extent)? Did the Grinch stole Christmas? Nah. For a while, Christmas wasn't in my heart... it consisted on memorizing carols, doing props, preparing decor, meeting deadlines, and anticipating the end.
Wasn't Christmas supposed to be
CHRIST. MasterAndSaviour?

Recently, I was doing my QT (after some time of absence) and I thought that in my desire to run away from everything, to spend some time doing absolutely nothing...I thought i was standing still. Not moving forward, not moving backwards. But no, I thought wrong.

In John 1:23,31, John's ministry was to prepare the nation for the messiah, and to point Him out when he Came. And in the passage, John humbly sought God and seeked to be a lamp-a reflector of the light. The song "give me oil in my lamp, give me burning; give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning I pray..." comed to minds.

John MacArthur put it very nicely.
We are never just standing still. We're either icnreasing our resemblance to CHrist's character, or we're looking more like ourselves-more controlled by our own desires and appetites.

It's time to ask God to give me oil in my lamp.


***

I realised that I do not really fancy war books. They are too depressing. Somehow every minute action becomes amplified-a scratch, the itch, the colour of the bile, the sound of the railways, the sound of silence, the features of a body-it is almost like the people only start to make careful observations, to etch to one's memory about a person for everyday, every moment could be their last. :\