I feel absolutely refreshed and ready to start the new week..or rather the second day of the week.

Honestly, my heart was heavy and burdened by a few matters last week. It was a "what do you know? When it rains, it pours" moment. Everything just came at one shot, similar to how when you insert a coin into the baseball machine and the baseballs just come aiming at you.

Strangely, the friend whom I was supposed to meet today could not make it at the eleventh hour so I spent the entire day with no plans.
Made 2 cards for a friend, attempted to transfer contacts from the old phone and failed miserably (so friends, drop me a sms and tell me who are you are alright! ☺ ), read the twelve ordinary men, thought of objectives for Monday, did some research on Chinatown, then embarked on a very long 3h+ walk to east coast. There was no mp3 plugged in to my ear for me to indulge in my melancholic emotions and my best friend was busy mugging for her exams while the other one who lives near me was working so they were not able to accompany me in my long walk. Not that it affected me, I guess everything worked out for a purpose and I thoroughly enjoyed the walk.

I saw kids ridding at the back seat on the bicycle while their dad rode tirelessly and listened to the kids ramble on about their bestfriends in school or tattletale about their annoying brother. Haha. I saw coconuts floating on the water, youths swimming freely in the open sea, young and old people fitter than me by probably a 100000x running and panting past me, novice in-line skaters falling and laughing… I absorbed everything.

During the walk, I thought about all the events that happened last week and realized that within a span of a week, I experienced every single emotion. There was a cauldron of emotions brewing that required me to organize my thoughts and emotions before I literally go mad. Standing there slipper-less, my legs constantly being crashed by the waves, my foot dug deep in the sand, my eyes fixed on the horizon, the entire week ran through my mind like a crazy film. Only thing was that when I looked at the entire situation from a macro view, I knew what to do.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”-Proverbs 3:5,6

There are some things that’s beyond me to handle, then there are other aspects in which I wish I could help but yet, limitations are limitless almost seeming like I might as well just give up, which I did feel like doing so! The funny thing about me is that when I do a little roar and say that I refuse to think further, I refuse to do anything and I give up… what I mean is that I need some time to think, to be still, to not let my emotions alone control me any further. Emotions are one of the most untamed things that exist. They have burned, raged and even crippled me before. And of course it can and have gone the other way before too. ☺

Some of the matters have not been settled BUT, I know that my heart to ready to handle it rightly. The walk was much needed and pleasant. I should do it more often rather than doing silly stuff like boxing on wii!!!! Wahahha..

That night, I had a very long monologue with my best of the best friend and I was a little perplexed as to why there was no response and an outright answer to all the problems that were facing me heads on. Why was it a monologue and not a conversation? I forgot the crucial thing-Time. ☺ Wait! Patience my dear girl with many eyes!

Was listening to some of the new songs that Uncle and Charis sent me, and there’s this song that wholly tugged the strings of my heart. The Calling by Regina Spektor from the Prince Caspian OST. A friend once introduced to me this song but today, listening to it brought me much comfort! ☺

The Calling

It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder
'Til it was a battle cry
I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye

Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never been this way before
All you can do is try to know who your friends are
As you head off to the war

Pick a star on the dark horizon
And follow the light
You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye

You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye

Now we're back to the beginning
It's just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can't feel it too
Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
'Til they're before your eyes
You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye

You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye