I feel strange.

That night I found myself tossing in bed thinking about a lot of things-friends who have left, friends who are leaving, friends who are coming back, friends whom I have not had a meal with for years suddenly asking me out, school, future, relationships, art, my goldfish eye members, ministry and MIMBY. (and I wonder why I could not get to sleep)

MIMBY
Although I have been an OIC for events before, the feeling this time as OIC for MIMBY seems a little daunting and as I try to tie up some loose ends for the 1st meeting agenda… How do I express this?

One moment, I am excited and all geared up to work through MIMBY, and then the next moment, I am afraid that the concept is not strong or not as well articulated as I had in mind during my random bouts of inspiration.

*sigh * Ineffable. Pray for and with me as I continue to work through the plans, objectives, and committees for MIMBY. Pray for SPI and Desire members too for ready hearts to take on the roles appointed and be faithful in the areas in which they have been called to.

Relationships
In case some monkeys out there think I’m attached, and going through a rough patch. No, sorry to disappoint. ;) Relationships can take many forms. How to make a relationship work? It requires time, effort, energy, understanding, patience, purpose, and love.
I am generally very happy with my various circles of friends that I hang out with. However, this year, I challenged myself to be more pro-active in my various friendships. Occasionally when I am less busy, I will take time off to plan outings, meet them, or really plan something when it’s someone’s birthday or a special occasion. This year, I invited more friends to my house to just chill out, embrace the challenge of finding time for friends and be more effective when I do work, go out for meals with various people more often. And to be honest, I have been enjoying it even though it means some sacrifices, energy and effort. In retrospect, I find it all worthwhile. During this time, I managed to go deeper in terms of my chats, allowing both my friends and I to be surprised with the depth of our sharing’s. The reason why I treasure this is because it is with understanding the person so much more that my genuine interest to be interested in a person’s life, be involved in a person’s life as simple as to found praying for them, messaging each other our happy and crap days, encourage one other… The feeling is extraordinary. ☺

Future
“I want to be an art therapist!” My mind is set. I told everybody with such gusto and thrill to everybody who asked me what I want to be in the future. Well, plans changed upon taking my psych module. It made me cry. Not that I fear science and unwilling to embrace difficulties, but I came to realize that it is not something that I am really interested in. The idea of being an art therapist will brings a smile to my face but is it something I really want go all out and do? Questionable. Sometimes I lay n bed wondering what would it be like if I had gone to poly and gotten my diploma? Or wondered what sort of work would I be producing if I was at NTU’s art, design and media course now. The green always seem greener on the other side eh? I remember my dad asking me like more than 10 times if I want to reconsider my choice to come here. Stubborn, that’s my second name. We all make choices, sometimes we do not make the best choices, but let’s grit our teeth and work through it! ☺

Really hoping to do something that I enjoy in NUS though. We’d see come the end of this sem. Watch out for this space about my very exciting future. Haha.

However, this May-July holiday, I want to dedicate a week to doing a painting. Landscape? Portraiture? I don’t know. Something. Go out to take more photos with my toy that people laugh at. Hmph!!! From that humble toy will give rise to amazing photos one day once I’ve played around with it more often. Please donate to the “Fund the girl with many eyes who aspires to be an artist”. Any amount would be welcomed with open arms. Yea, all the talk about how during recession, the arts is always be the first to go. Grr.. Whatever!

I can already imagine myself sitting in the living room in the middle of the night doing a painting, and listening to my music library or some particular track on repeat. *beams * Then at 5am, I’d sneak into bed before my dad stirs and leave a big mess in the living room for it to take a life of its own ☺ ☺ OH SO EXCITING!!!!!!