Remember a few days back I was very shocked to be confronted by something I read and I said I would share it? Well, here it is.

It was during my QT, and it was about Peter trying to interfere with other people’s life, wanting to be too involved to the point that he got rebuked because in a sense, it seemed like he was trying to play God by interfering with God’s plan for others.

So I asked myself if I have been like Peter, whereby instead of letting a person go through it, I try means and ways to “protect” the person, instead of trusting and letting God control the situation, and let His will be done. In the book, it focused more about interfering with God’s plan for others, but I went a notch deeper and thought have I tried to interfere with God’s plans for myself???

Being a perfectionist, a go-getter, anal person, I do not deny that there have been times where I’ve done it. Self-centredness? Yea. Some times, I am aware of it so I have to consciously be on my guard, be conscious about the way I think, the way I behave, but while I was reading, it said something so impactful that I shall quote it
“Maturity is produced in the life of a child of God on the UNCONSCIOUS LEVEL…totally surrendered to God that we are not even aware of being used by Him”

Upon reading that, my jaw dropped. Never have I ever thought about it this way!!

I changed the last part which I thought summarized this whole thought very well.

A Christian is never consciously a Christian-a Christian is consciously dependent on God.

☺

Anyway, I am very thankful. I remember sharing with Gwen and peng while finalizing all my MIMBY plans that I am actually very excited&scared at the same time for various reasons and I think there were times whereby I was so unsure that sticking to the safe route would not sound too bad an idea. Really thankful for the support, the prayers, the trust, the inspiration, the guts, and the lesson on humility which I taught(before I taught I had to learn right?) hahah.

This MIMBY, although we’ve only had one meeting so far, has been one where I’ve been greatly encouraged by my committee members’ willingness, dedication, fervor to serve. Besides the change in attitude, I am also glad that I forged new friendships!! In particular, there are 2 people whom I rarely talk too although I see them every week, and now I am glad that I am slowly getting to know them as a friend. They are Fish and Choon Kiat. ☺
Believe it or not, I actually know who are all the people in desire cg too!!! Haha.

Slowly feeling the stretch from MIMBY, ministry, food hunt, school…but I am thankful for every single moment.
On a side note, I was doing my morning calls to al the various companies to follow up whether they are wiling to do a business collaboration with one of school’s upcoming event. It is alright if the person was not willing. What’s more my credibility was undermined, and I was questioned about my age, how I don’t sound(literally) my age that it makes it hard for her to trust me. I was appalled. Now I know why I am not getting enough sponsorship. ☹

This is not the first time. Last year when I was working with the theatre school and had to get the copyright for a play, I was lectured about the seriousness and importance of getting copyrights, and how if I fail at any step would result in consequences. Mind you, I got scolded over the phone all the way from UK when I really did nothing wrong besides enquiring. Once again, my age made them panicked.

Nobody trusts me! First, I was the mole. Next I was the Polar bear. Then I was a partner-in-crime in tricking CX. So much for building my reputation eh?

It’s me. It’s me. It’s me. Hahahha..

Note to self: When I do my calls tomorrow, I shall say I’m 100 years old.

Alright, back to work!